My Daughter and Her Friends

[madrobins]

I'm listening with about a third of my ear to Avocado, on the phone in the other room. She's on with a friend from camp who lives more or less locally, and with whom she's had an on-again-off-again relationship this year. "We texting and stuff," she told me, last time I checked about the friendship. So her friend just called, and Avocado forgets all the resentments and concerns, and is asking questions about what her friend has been doing, talking about her own friendships, listening (that is, taking actual breaks in her own narrative to listen, then say, "That is so AWESOME!" and ask questions and say "AWESOME!" again--drawing her friend out, in other words). It's a set of skills I learned later than she did--in fact, I think she was born with them. I'm often awed with the way the kid negotiates, brings friends together, enjoys her friendships without keeping score (look! someone likes me!) or using them against each other. She's a basically happy person, and makes the people around her basically happy too.